No news is great news

It has been three months since our Honeydog was diagnosed with a malignant tumor and given a month to live.  I feel like I have been on death watch for that entire time.  Babes and I returned to the US, leaving DH in Wuhan with Honeydog, and every day I called him wondering if this was the day I would get the news that she was leaving us.  Yet surprisingly, that day never came.  While we were gone a new tumor started growing on her face, and I thought for sure that this was it.  But we came back to Wuhan and the new tumor on her face is gone and she is still her normal, sweet, spunky self.  I call it a miracle, and even if it doesn't last, I am on my knees every night thanking God for the extra day we have had with her.

So what have I been up to?  Well, we went back to the US, and I enjoyed every minute of blue skies and sunshine that I could.  I ate LOTS of avocados (which they don't have in Wuhan). And I wandered around the malls, and grocery stores, marveling at the clothes that I could wear and the food that I love. I even hit some tourist sites in Philly (which I NEVER do).
Well, I basically just wanted to break the writer's block.  In case you are somewhere like Wuhan where you've forgotten what a blue sky looks like, this is for you:

Just a dog

We are going to lose our Honeydog... No, let me say it right, Honeydog is going to die.  What started out as a weird little bump on her sweet face turned out to be a fast growing cancer, that has spread to her lymph nodes.  But whatever, no big deal right?  I knew this day was coming, I knew we were going to far far out live her, after all she's just a dog,right?
Trouble is, Honey is going to take with her a piece of my heart.  I have never cried so much over anything in all my life (ok, well since reaching my middle childhood years).  When we found out that there was nothing more we could do I cried off and on for 2 days.  The sound of my heartbreak must have been very loud indeed because it woke up Babes, DH, and Honeydog at 2 am even though I was making no sound at all.  I honestly didn't expect this sort of reaction, after all she's just a dog, right?
Honeydog has been with us for a short 7 years.  She was DH and my first big responsibility.  We endured racing outside 4-5 times a day during her housebreaking, little puppy whines at 3 in the morning, and destroyed household furnishings.  She taught me the value of patience, love, discipline and consistency.  Barely 6 months after we got her we knew Babes was on the way, and I cracked down on her discipline and routines because I knew change was coming.  I wasn't too worried about Honeydog, after all she's just a dog, right?

Honeydog, not even a full year old, nursed me through my pregnancy.  She was there all day, and by my side when, at 6 months I was still morning sick.  She went to the bathroom door with me and waited patiently for me to come back out with a worried look on her face.  If there was no Honeydog, I wouldn't have gotten off the couch during those horrible months, but her need for walks and attention, spurred me to lift my ballooning body into motion.  Yes, as I got bigger, those walks got smaller, but she'd be okay, after all she's just a dog, right?

After Babes came, I appreciated Honeydog all the more, she was patient, loving, and put up with a whole lot.  I have a video of infant Babes beating Honey over the head with a toy.  Honey didn't move, didn't complain she just tolerated that abuse.  The bond between girl and dog did not happen immediately.  Instead, Honeydog went from ignoring the mild nuisance that took up all our time, to occasionally being interested when she started eating solid foods, to waiting patiently for her to wake up from naps or come home from school.  Babes herself considers Honeydog her best friend, her security blanket, her big sister, and the champion of all her stories.  Honeydog plays a prominent roll in any story, any picture, or any song that Babes creates.  I still don't know how I'm going to tell her that she is going to leave us.  But it's okay right, after all she's just a dog, right?

Honeydog has been with us through 5 international moves.  She has lived in 4 countries, she has been spoken to in 3 different languages.  And people love her everywhere.  I have never met a gentler soul than Honeydog.  I truly believe that, because of our lifestyle, Honey missed her true calling to be a therapy dog.  She is so patient and loving, and calm.  Whenever I had to leave her with someone, be it grooming, or boarding, I always heard back that everyone loved Honey.  With Honey around I never have to worry if there's a strange noise, if it's something to worry about she will bark and check it out.  With Honey around I'm never all alone in a strange house, she's there to listen to me talk.  With Honey around there's always a cold nose, warm dog breath, and soft fur.  After all, she's just a dog, right?
Right?
The only thing I know is that the world will be a colder scarier place from now on.

Worry and visit vets

I know, I know, it's been weeks and weeks!  I expected to be gone for a week in our Spring trip to Japan--actually I thought I might get to post at least once from there, but no, the internet was way too spotty for me to get anything online.  But when we got home I took one look at Honeydog's face and freaked out... About two months ago we noticed a small spot on her face, could have been a bump, or a bruise, so I thought, well let's wait and see.  Right before we left, it STILL hadn't gone away so I took her to a vet who looked at it and said tumor!  I thought, really?  Tumor, no test, no real look, just a glance and a poke.  So we went on vacation, praying all the while that this lump would just go away.  However, this is one time where my wait and see policy did NOT pay off.  When we got back I could tell right away that this was not just going to disappear, and I began to worry, and visit vets.  And worry, and visit vets.

Have you ever tried to find a vet in a country where you can't read internet posts, or phone books?  Well, it's hard.  For the past week I've been basically wandering around Wuhan with my smart phone, google maps, and my bus pass visiting vets.  Here's the thing, they have vets here, but they are scary.  Most of the time they are dirty; imagine dog paws and people shoes tracking mud and dust but only sweeping once a day.  Add to that cigarette ash and people trash on a white linoleum floor (or what used to be white).  Now picture steel trays as examination tables and dingy walls.  Put all this in a room the size of a fast food bathroom and you will have most of the vets that I've visited.  And the vets themselves; most of them had this haughty attitude and would only talk to you through an assistant.  I never once saw anyone wash their hands, even when they went from examining an animal to eating their lunch.  I was scared (I think it gave me another gray hair!) I couldn't leave Honeydog in the hands of these guys.  I just couldn't.

Finally, with the help of DH and his co-workers we found a place that wasn't some dude and his assistant.  It was still a dismally depressing place to go to, but it was clean (ish) and the vets themselves were clean, and most importantly it didn't smell bad.  As with everything in China, there was no privacy.  The doctors examined Honeydog in the waiting area, she got shots, an IV lead put in, and had her consultation without moving from where we first came in.  Not that there was anywhere private.

  Even when they took her in to operate (yes, they put her to sleep, and cut out a huge chunk of her face) people came and went from the operating room ALL THE TIME!
But she is home eating, drinking, and resting well.  She has to wear the cone of shame for the next two weeks, but it's a small price to pay for our Honeydog to be ok.

Honey dog!

Last Friday our Honeydog FINALLY made it home!  She's been staying with my parents since we came to Wuhan because United changed their dog flight policy to require us to ship Honeydog cargo.  Poor dog.  Not only did she have to stay crated for the long overseas flight (15 hours or so) BUT they kept her crated the entire time she was trying to clear customs (2 days).  I have no idea if they let her out once a day, or if she was required to stay crated. We hired a shipper for that part of the journey, and while I asked these questions, their answers were vague (and I think I'd rather not know).
Anyway, she's home now, safe, and sound, which is all that really matters.  I can honestly say, that I will be trying to find a way to fly other than United when it comes time to leave Wuhan.
Anyway, this is why we did it (yes, it is only about 2 seconds) don't blink you'll miss it.